Chuck Norris Facts

Discussion in 'Off-Topic Forum' started by Sara, Jul 12, 2008.

  1. Sara

    Sara

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    I don't think we've had a thread about Chuck Norris. If so, let's refresh everyones memory on why he's such a bad ass. I'll start....

    Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, too bad he's never cried.

    Chuck Norris can kick you in the back of the face.


    I know there are a million funny Chuck Norris facts out there. List your favorites!
     
    Sara, Jul 12, 2008
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  2. Sara

    Alexander

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    Oh hay sara!!! Your back!
     
    Alexander, Jul 12, 2008
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  3. Sara

    yote Ceritfied Mantis Hunter Moderator

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    Glad to see you posting Sara.
    As for a Chuck Norris fact,He's getting old.:mrgreen:
     
    yote, Jul 12, 2008
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  4. Sara

    Oscarsdad608

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    The big bang theory. Chuck Norris and Mr.T punched each other at the same time.
     
    Oscarsdad608, Jul 12, 2008
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  5. Sara

    RyanG ^*Eternal Dumbass*^

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    Chuck Norris doesnt cut the grass he stares at it and dares it to grow.

    (All valley girl) Oh how 5 minutes ago!
     
    RyanG, Jul 12, 2008
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  6. Sara

    simpleman

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    My grandpa has sparred with Chuck Norris. No joke I've seen the pics!
     
    simpleman, Jul 12, 2008
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  7. Sara

    RyanG ^*Eternal Dumbass*^

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    Is he out of the hospital yet? haha
     
    RyanG, Jul 12, 2008
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  8. Sara

    simpleman

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    Ha! Nah it was just a demo for his dojo 20 years ago.
     
    simpleman, Jul 12, 2008
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  9. Sara

    Sara

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    Is that all you guys have? I'm kind of disappointed.

    Chuck Norris counted to infinity....twice.
     
    Sara, Jul 13, 2008
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  10. Sara

    RyanG ^*Eternal Dumbass*^

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    Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer.
     
    RyanG, Jul 13, 2008
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  11. Sara

    Oscarsdad608

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    Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table. because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
     
    Oscarsdad608, Jul 13, 2008
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  12. Sara

    Bifferwine I am a girl

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    Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

    Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He just stares them down until they give him the information he wants.
     
    Bifferwine, Jul 13, 2008
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  13. Sara

    Oscarsdad608

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    Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
     
    Oscarsdad608, Jul 13, 2008
    #13
  14. Sara

    cumminz

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    Chuck Norris does not fight cavities, they are too scared to form in his teeth.

    Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you're thinking to yourself, "But Chuck Norris isn't black", then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.

    Most people fear the Reaper. Chuck Norris considers him "a promising Rookie".

    People created the automobile to escape from Chuck Norris...Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris created the automobile accident.

    It is scientifically impossible for Chuck Norris to have had a mortal father. The most popular theory is that he went back in time and fathered himself.

    As President Roosevelt said: "We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Chuck Norris."
     
    cumminz, Jul 16, 2008
    #14
  15. Sara

    kyle

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    chuck norris was working on his truck on a hot summer day, a sweat droplet landed on the engine and optimis prime was born!
     
    kyle, Jul 16, 2008
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  16. Sara

    dustin_P74

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    chuck norris doesnt have a chin under his beard, only another fist

    chuck norris once visited the virgin islands, now they are just called the islands
     
    dustin_P74, Jul 21, 2008
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