Help me convince my wife to start a nano tank on my dime-build thread

[Dturner]

Guys,

I am having trouble convincing my wife to let me purchase a 10-15 gallon "all in one" nano tank for her. I can afford it and I don't mind helping her with maintenance (by that I mean do all the maintenance for her) but she doesn't want a tank in the upstairs of our house, she just wants my 120 in the basement (finished basement).

What can I say or do to convince her? Any advice from similar situations anyone?

My goal is to get her a tank so she becomes more involved in the hobby. It's hard to be interested unless you are actively participating in it, so by getting her a tank, she would have a piece of the reef to call her own.

Help!

 

[softchxntaco]

guilt her into it when she claims you dont do anything with her

 

[Nanna]

How involved would she be in this tank if you did all the maintenance? Sounds like you would have a new 10-15 gal tank for yourself. If she shows no interest in the large tank in the basement maybe this hobby just isn't for her. You can't force it on her. Just my 2 cents.

 

[chichimom79]

I agree with Nanna. You can't make her like something that she just doesn't get into. If you really want her to like reefing, maybe suggest trying something she enjoys that you don't particularly like doing. Fair trade :D

 

[Smitty]

+2 Nanna...don't force it, eventually she'll see your tank become more and more beautiful, and find interest in just watching yours. Maybe then, she might want her own.

 

[AdamC]

Just buy it and set it up and when she walks in from work. SURPRISE!!! :^::bounce:

 

[little_fish]

Get her to find a fish she really likes and then tell her it wont work in your setup and she will need to get her own

 

[texreefer]

Just buy it and set it up and when she walks in from work. SURPRISE!!! :^::bounce:

^^This could make her realize that she was wrong on not wanting the tank to begin with , or make her realize she is ready to send you packing.


get video of whatever happens. We could use some comedy around here.

 

[tritan]

little_fish is spot on. When we first acquired the tank my wife wanted nothing to do with it. I told her "well you pick a fish you like". She fell in love with a coral beauty and bought him and acclimated him all by herself (with my guidance). I also asking her to feed them when I was away and that got her excited to do stuff. Of course I do all the maintenance but she loves going to fish stores with me now looking at new stuff to get. She is still not fond of the amount of money we have spent but is realizing that its worth it.

 

[Cheeser]

what i did...
start with something smaller and less expensive. like the deco kit or picotope nano. theyre lke 60 bucks. all u need is a little sand and rock....and water, a couple colorful frags...make it look pretty and she might gain an interest...i would always say "damn babe if we had a bigger tank we can really get some nice looking corals!" and at first she wouldnt say anything but now shes all like "yeah i know right!"

 

[wontonflip]

She's not a child LOL

My hubby wanted nothing to do with my tank...then eventually, HE wanted to upgrade to a larger tank (hell, he STILL wants a larger tank than my 125g now LOL)...so we upgraded :D He got to build the stand and even got new tools out of it. I can't say he's totally into the tank maintenance, but he loves the fish and always gets sad if one dies. Sometimes, they just come around ;)

 

[Trigger Happy]

Get her to find a fish she really likes and then tell her it wont work in your setup and she will need to get her own

+1 little_fish

Or just get her a fish she can have in your tank that she really likes. Maybe get a gorgeous one and name it after her. Not a dog face puffer!

 

[SarahSmile]

I don't know. I think you either love this hobby or you don't. My husband doesn't give a rats patoot about my tank, he views it as my thing and I can't see that ever changing. Maybe it's ok that she's not into it, she probably has a hobby or two that you want nothing to do with. :)
In the beginninng I tried to involve him, get his opinion, etc but now I sort of realize I like that it's "my" tank and I make the decisions and I'm the one who painstakingly researches and obsesses.
Sometimes it's nice to have something on your own. I'd embrace it!

 

[little_fish]

After having the tank up for a bit I think she will get attached to the fish, even if they wont admit it. My boyfriend pretends that he doesnt care about the fish but we once had a clownfish get caught in the plumbing and was almost in tears trying to save this fish.

 

[Dturner]

Well great suggestions and comments from everyone. After a discussion with her she agreed to let me buy her a 2-4 gallon nano tank... I think I am going to go with an 8 for more stability, she'll understand. Interesting perspectives from everyone though, this has been good discussion. I will probably get her tank a couple paychecks from now and keep you posted when I do. Going to be a fair amount of planning. Thanks again for the comments.